“‘No’ is a complete sentence, but for those who need more info ‘sorry, I can’t, I’m self-caring today’ works just as well’” @Spreeisms
Many of us who suffer from lack of self-care don’t even realize that often we are not buried under work, tasks, or homelife of our own; a lot of the times we are over extending ourselves to others. Being an empath or a compassionate person has its pros and cons and the only way to maintain the sweet side is knowing when to say “No.”
We want to be able to stay true to being the giving person we are, and self-maintenance is a huge part of conserving compassion. Whether you are that go-to person for friends and family to vent, or the one your manager knows will come through last minute or when the job is understaffed, saying ‘No’ when needed is an integral part of self-care — and it that took me years to implement.
I want to introduce you to a term we use often in my field: Compassion Fatigue. Compassion fatigue is emotional unavailability or disconnection due to extended periods of serving others without serving yourself. If you feel apathetic, taken for granted, or have isolated yourself from people who typically lean on you – you may have compassion fatigue. Learning to recognize and manage its symptoms is the first step toward healing from this form of secondary trauma. Implementing a sustainable self-care schedule can be the difference between becoming too overwhelmed to maintain relationships and having firm boundaries that allow you personal time.
I’m hoping everyone who read last week’s post implemented their self-care schedules. This week’s challenge is to turn down at least ONE unplanned interruption to your schedule. So, if a friend pops up “needs” a wingman during your Wednesday night meditation, you can use my line ‘Sorry, I can’t, I’m self-caring today’.